Why OBGYN on Patient Abuse Often Goes Unnoticed

For many women, visits to an OBGYN can be uncomfortable; even when your doctor is professional and kind, the appointment involves exposure, vulnerability, and intimate touching. But uncomfortable examinations shouldn’t make you feel violated or demeaned.

The issue is, even when a woman feels violated visiting their OBGYN, they frequently brush this off as normal. Pelvic exams are supposed to be uncomfortable, they think. It’s not wrong the doctor touched me like that; it was probably just part of the examination.

Because OBGYNs deal with some of our most intimate body parts, it can be hard to tell what actions by a doctor are normal and what crosses the line into assault. This leads to many OBGYN on patient abuse cases going unnoticed and unreported. But there are other things that can make this type of abuse hard to spot, too. Let’s explore why harmful behavior by OBGYNS can be difficult to recognize and how you can better identify signs that your doctor may be acting inappropriately.

The Power Imbalance

Doctors hold a position of authority. We grow up with the message that they’re experts we can trust with our health and our bodies. This creates a power dynamic where patients may feel hesitant to question a doctor’s actions, even if something feels wrong. You might feel that because they have a medical degree, they know better than you do about your own body.

This deference to authority can make you second-guess your own feelings. You might dismiss a sense of violation as an overreaction or a misunderstanding of medical procedure. The doctor’s confidence and professional demeanor can further reinforce the idea that everything they do is medically necessary and standard practice.

Lack of Clear Boundaries

The OBGYN field is unique because examinations are inherently invasive. This can blur the lines between a standard medical procedure and abuse. A patient may not know what a “normal” pelvic exam or breast exam should feel like, which makes it easy for an abusive doctor to take advantage of the situation.

For example, an abuser might perform unnecessary touches, prolong an examination, or make inappropriate comments under the guise of medical care. Without a clear understanding of what’s medically appropriate, a patient can easily mistake abusive behavior for a standard part of the check-up. This uncertainty is a powerful tool for abusers, as it creates doubt in the patient’s mind.

Normalization of Discomfort

Women’s pain and discomfort are frequently dismissed in medical settings. You might have been told that pain is just a part of being a woman, or that you’re being “too sensitive.” This societal conditioning can lead you to believe that any discomfort you feel during an OBGYN visit is something you just have to endure.

When you’ve been taught to ignore your own body’s signals, it becomes much harder to recognize when a boundary has been crossed. You might rationalize the experience by telling yourself, “It’s supposed to hurt a little,” or “It’s always awkward.” This normalization of discomfort makes it difficult to distinguish between routine medical unpleasantness and actual abuse.

The Doctor’s Manipulation Tactics

Abusive medical professionals are masters of manipulation. They know how to exploit the trust and vulnerability of their patients. An abuser might use a friendly or charming personality to put you at ease, which makes it harder to believe they could do something wrong.

They might also use medical jargon to confuse or intimidate you, which makes you feel like you can’t question their actions. Some abusers will isolate patients by insisting that a chaperone is not needed or by conducting exams in a way that feels secretive. These tactics are all designed to maintain control and prevent the patient from recognizing the abuse.

Lack of Education on Patient Rights

Many women aren’t fully aware of their rights as patients. You have the right to have a chaperone present for any examination. You have the right to ask questions about any procedure and to have it explained to you in terms you can understand. You have the right to say “stop” at any time.

When you don’t know your rights, you can’t advocate for yourself effectively. An abusive doctor can take advantage of this lack of knowledge. Education about patient rights is a powerful tool for prevention, as it empowers you to set boundaries and demand respectful care.

Gaslighting by the Abuser

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where an abuser makes a victim question their own reality. An abusive doctor might do this by denying their actions, which suggests the patient imagined it or is being overly sensitive. They might say things like, “That’s a normal part of the exam,” or “You’re just feeling anxious.”

This can be incredibly disorienting and can cause you to doubt your own perceptions. Over time, gaslighting can erode your self-trust, which makes it even harder to recognize that you’re a victim of abuse. You may start to believe that you’re the one with the problem, not the doctor.

Difficulty Recalling Details

Trauma can affect memory. After an abusive experience, you might find it difficult to recall the exact details of what happened. Your memory may feel fragmented or blurry, which can make you question the validity of your own experience. It’s helpful to remember that a fragmented memory of a traumatic event is a normal response. It doesn’t mean the abuse didn’t happen.

You’re Not Alone

OBGYN on patient abuse goes unnoticed and unreported because survivors don’t understand that what happened to them isn’t normal. Or, even when they’re aware their doctor’s actions aren’t right, they’re scared of the consequences of reporting. They don’t want to relive the trauma. They feel ashamed.

But survivors should know these things: they’re not alone. Their legal team will do everything to protect them. And their decision to speak up can bring their abuser to justice. This can mean closure for them. But it can also give other women the courage to come forward, and it can protect other patients from what they experienced.

If you’ve been assaulted and want to speak with a lawyer, Tamara N. Holder and her team specialize in gynecologist sexual assault cases. We’ve helped many other women bring charges against their doctors and win their cases. Don’t hesitate to reach out to us. Our kind and empathetic team will listen to your story and help you understand your legal options. We’ll be at your side the entire way and provide support as you bravely seek justice.